Wednesday, December 7, 2011

5 LIFE LESSONS I LEARNED FROM FIBROMYALGIA

  1. When you are diagnosed with a chronic medical condition, don't fight it. You don't have to like it, but life is so much easier when you accept it.
  2. Educating people on your condition can be frustrating. This has almost taught me to be patient with others.
  3. Before we were diagnosed with our “chronic condition”, the life we lived in became a blur. We rushed from here to there, and back again; worked endlessly at our career for more money and to give us a feeling of self worth; were to busy to listen (really listen) to our loved ones. (I am saying this based on my life – yours may be different). And now, for me:
  • I literally stop to smell the flowers, or to notice the red berries on the bare branches.
  • When I look out the window and see a Cardinal, I run for the binoculars to get a better look, and feel a great joy within my soul for having seen this beautiful creature.
  • When I am in a moderately bad flare, and spend a lot of time in bed, my family knows they are more than welcome to come and sit with me – on the bed – even the kids friends. I may be barely able to smile, or contribute to the conversation, but I listen to them, really listen, and it is a great feeling for all of us. Even if we just sit in silence.
  • I try to be nicer to my husband and appreciate all that he does, his help and understanding (finally), his carting the kids, even though he is tired from work; but I go back to the days when first met, and remember why I fell in love with him, and I am falling in love all over again.
  • I try to be mindful every day, every moment (doesn’t always happen!! :) ) More on being mindful another time. But a good example my counselor gave me was, when I was working, he said when your phone rings, before you answer it, “stop”, “take a breath”, “answer phone” - you have then put yourself “in the moment, and mindful of answering the phone.
4.  I have learned to accept (not always) that I can't do all the things I used to be able to do. I used to be a “Type A” personality; very organized, logistically inclined on getting things done in the most efficient way, keeping track of just about everything at work and at home. (P.S. I have ADHD). After work, and after taking care of the family and kids were settled, my time was spent on my latest interest – usually till 11:00 / 12:00 at night. Since I've had Fibromyalgia, I am no longer that person. And it is “OK”. I am still the same caring person, who would like to be able to do all of the above, but I have learned to limit myself, and use my energy accordingly by focusing on the most important things. Most of the time, I can accept this; sometimes I cannot accept it – and that's “OK” to. All part of being mindful.

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